I watched this video when he uploaded it onto his YouTube, like, a month ago and I still can’t seem to get enough of it. It makes me laugh and be proud to be a filipina. I just thought I would share it with everyone because it’s that awesome.
AND if you liked this, you have to (HAVE TO) check out his Filipino tutorials. He has a pretty awesome voice too, if you want to check out the other videos as well.
…minding my own business, innocently drinking my lemonade iced tea when my ego and self esteem were simultaneously shattered by a couple of drive by bullets fired by a petite high school senior. She was talking to an older couple (who I can only assume she’d paid off to listen to her ramble on and on about herself) and, apparently, she found it necessary to tell the entire café that she was “just so sure that [she] got a full ride scholarship to Harvard or Stanford – whichever [she] decided to get back to first.” I gagged a little in my cup. Not because I hate one or both of those schools. I don’t hate one more than the other. I’m sure that they would have equally and eloquently both told me to shove it if…ehem, I chose to apply to either school. Those schools don’t bother me. The future lawyer, I mean doctor, I mean teacher (she couldn’t decide what she wanted to be when she grew up) didn’t even bother me that much. No, I gagged because at seventeen, I had that much gusto and spunk – and egotistical nerve. I could have taken over the world at seventeen. What happened to me? Adulthood has tamed my inflamed ego and put it out with its big, bulky, black combat boots of shame. Just stomped it to bits.
After she left, I was still sitting at my table, hanging my head in shame. I felt like I had just watched In Pursuit of Happiness with Will Smith. After that movie I felt like I had not accomplished anything in my life. I have no excuse to be happy. My life was a lie. I felt like writing one of those depressing Russian novels about being depressed and impoverish. Where was my vodka?!
That’s when I decided I would spend all of next week or the next five hours (it all depends on how long it takes me to drink away her memory – take that Tolstoy) doing something that will make me feel like my life wasn’t the biggest waste of space. Like curing cancer, inventing an alternate and environmentally safe for of fuel that I can sell at a low cost and smells like fresh cut grass without the hay fever, or stopping cows from flatulating in our fields and causing the world to slowly and painfully deteriorate inadvertently causing our equally slow and painful deaths. Or maybe I can just save the world from impending doom at the hands of my evil nemesis by wearing my underwear on the outside of my pants and running around with a black cape and matching leotards. Or perhaps I could just give a homeless man the change that I got back when I bought my lemonade iced tea. Oh, that’s right. I used my debit card. What was I thinking about again? Oh well, must not have been important. Back to the task at hand. Should I buy a Nook or a Kindle? I wonder if Cosmo comes on an e-reader.
…revision of my film noir-esque screenplay. I don’t know if I’m going to shoot this one or not. My budget likes this one more and not a more make-up driven story like my zombie script. Since stories like this focus more on a good script and not special effects, this would also require more of me.
With this in mind, you should watch The Big Sleep with Lauren Bacall and Humphrey Bogart because it is beyond awesome. Also, check out Lucky Number Slevin with Morgan Freeman, Ben Kingsley, and Josh Hartnett but you have to be patient with this one and you will be greatly rewarded at the end. I love a good mystery movie and both of these were up for the challenge.
So it isn’t the best movie in the world. In fact, I suggest that you watch this movie while you have a couple cocktails in you or perhaps while you are on a sinking ship… Of course, having these images as the last images in your head before you drown probably isn’t for the best.
The premise of the movie is that a group of ragtag 20 somethings are on a boat, named (drumroll please) the Titanic II, which is going to have its maiden voyage on the anniversary of the sinking of the original Titanic. You can imagine what happens next, of course, if you haven’t seen any of the original Titanic movies then I won’t ruin it for you.
The movie starts off with the entrance of all of the lovely ladies, complete with slow moving, long flowing hair and slow bouncing, overflowing cleavage. The part that makes me most sad is that with Spielberg’s Titanic, you had enough time and good dialogue to get to know the characters and not really want them to die. In this movie, you get to know the characters because you are forced to be in the same room as them and you want them all to drown even if that means that you go down with the boat as well. As with all of the other big boat movies, there is something wrong with the life rafts and people run around screaming when they should be doing something productive. When people get hurt, they take their clothes off and when they take their clothes off they get wet.
If you watch this movie, watch it with friends and bring lots of popcorn to throw at the screen.